Yo.
it's December 23rd today - which makes it Christmas Eve Eve, and I'm off school now for two weeks. Instead of novel editing and rewriting, or doing some much needed physics revision I've spent my time off so far buying last minute Christmas presents.
I just watched the movie Juno (GREAT film) with my mum which turned out to be a mistake, because she's been going through a stage where she confronts me about anything teenage pregnancy related whether it's a story from a friend, an Amanda Palmer song. If I mention one of my friends' boyfriends or anything like that, she'll raise an eyebrow and a little glint appears in her eye. I went out for lunch with her today and made the mistake of bringing up two of my friends who she knows have been in a relationship since about August.
"So who else is dating?" she'll say, all of a sudden patronising and smiley, like she's asking one of the kids in her class what Santa's bringing them for Christmas. "What about you, are you dating?", which I shrug off with a "mhnehh." "No, you're not ready for dating yet," she assures me, which always makes me feel about 12 years old. The worst thing she says is, "So do they snog?"
She's more immature than we are.
But today I decided to come right out with an honest answer instead of being evasive, so when she asked me how soon I'd tell her if I got pregnant now, I said, "I probably wouldn't. I'd go get an abortion sneakily and you'd never know."
She blinked at me. "How would you get an abortion?" she challenged.
"I'd use a fake name. And I could pay for it, there's money in my account and I hope some of my friends would chip in. They care about me."
"So you couldn't tell me?"
"If I needed to. But that's only in an emergency."
And I would: telling her would be inconvenient. She'd want to know who I'd had sex with and then describe him to all of her friends on the phone. In some ways she's more gosspiy than my teenage girl friends.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5VgLOs0LwQ
This is Jonsi, who I came across just a few days ago and I really like so far. Jonsi is an openly gay musician from Iceland, who is blind in one eye and was lead singer of the band Sigur Ros. I was completley surprised today to find that HMV actually had not one but two copies of his album "Go", and Wikipedia defines his music as post-rock, ambient and baroque pop. I bought "Go" (a present from my great-aunt, who always gives me £20 at Christmas to "buy myself something nice), and I'm loving it so far, it's calm and magical and sort of takes me away somewhere.. The track I posted above, "Go Do" is complete beauty. To me it sounds like horses hooves and fields, and something else. It's lighthearted and happy, dances between soft and strong, loud and quiet, peaceful.
Tomorrow I'm singing Christmas songs and playing guitar at something called Plot 13 (that's the place it's at, I call it so because it makes it sound so much more exciting than it really is) in front of fifty or so people. The upside is, they aren't people I know. I'm excited and also nervous, it's probably good for me even though I'm going to have to wake up at 7am on Christmas Eve -> eventual sleep deprivation. It's the holidays but I've been so busy that it looks like I'm still sticking to my school sleeping pattern for the time being.
So I have to go and sleep now, see?
If we don't speak before, or I'm not back here, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.
- lizzie
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